My head...the Enemy!

Here is what I know:

1.  I have come a long way since I got sober 21+ years ago.
2.  I have come a long way since I had my surgery almost 4 years ago.
3.  While I never made it to "my" WLS goal, I have lost 75+ pounds. (Surgeon never gave me a # to hit).
4.  I no longer have diabetes, sleep apnea, high cholesterol, high blood pressure.
5.  My rings had to be resized once already, and may have to resize them again.
6.  I still go to the "big girls" section in stores and have to remind myself that those sizes are too big!
7.  My shoe size went from 9 to 7.5/8, depending on the shoe.
8.  My husband can pick me up!
9.  I know that all of this makes me a successful WLS patient.
10.  My head still tells me I'm a failure cause I never made it to "my" goal...even when the surgeon tells me that I am one of his success stories.

My Head is my Enemy!!

So...what needs to happen here?  My head needs an adjustment!!!  WLS is NOT a quick fix nor the easy way to reduce body weight.  Anyone who tries to tell me that it was the easy way out, I literally want to just give them a whack!  Having surgery is NEVER easy and this is major surgery that is full of risk.  Yes, in the beginning, the weight literally falls off.  Every single day I got on the scale and celebrated the pounds that were just melting away.  But over time, the scale slows down and eventually, for me....stopped, and then started to go back up.  The "honeymoon" period ended and I realized that, while I had made many changes in my life related to the surgery, and had learned a great deal....my BRAIN was still my enemy.  My brain will tell me that "one bite wont hurt", and "just a little"....when the addiction will then kick in and I can't stop.  Ever eat only ONE red vine??  Me neither!

SO.....what do I have to do in order to continue to recover from this?  Take it a day at a time!  My sober sisters wrote up some affirmations for me a few months ago and I need to read them again.  I need to remember that the number on the scale does not define me.  I need to remember that I dont have to take insulin, or a handful of prescribed medications (just a handful of vitamins!).  I need to remember that different sizes of clothes are related to the cut and style of the item, not my worth.  I need to remember that if God brings me to it...God will bring me through it.  I learned that in a huge way this month...I need to never forget it.

What do you struggle with?  What does your addiction tell you?  How do you find YOUR solutions?
Blessings!